Siapa Tak Sayang Anak?

8 tahun 10 bulan 5 hari aku bersamanya. masa begitu pantas berlari meninggalkan detik2 pahit dan manis ketika menyambut kehadirannya dalam hidupku. He's my soul, he's my life and I am so gratefull to Allah because gave me Bless to have Aiman. Although sometimes I failed to control my emotions, I still believe my son would always love me.

Only fews of us could sharing thier feelings on how hard in raising an autism's child. Yes..my husband and I just aware this a few years back, when I'm attended a course about HOW TO HANDLE STRESS at Sabah, Malaysia. You didn't mentioned it right?..a common situations weather in small or big family, where parents getting lost temper and hit the child. Without knowing this child having a syndrom called autism...

Until now, I still regret hit my son when he's doing bad thing or something stupid...because he didn't knew how to express his feeling! He also didn't know to process a sentence when you ask him just at once..you have to say again and again with patient and sometimes have to explain on your own questions! I'am a bad temper once but now could consider that's from his syndrom.

An autism child doesn't have focus on everything except pitcure. Their 5 sense can't work together at one time...could you imagine how they facing school everyday?..year by year, I'm going to school just to listen the teacher that's my boy having a problem in class..and this year ( 2011), aiman will sitting on UPSR examination-a big exam for an autism child like him...so pity.

He always said-mother/dad, I can't understand what teacher said in school..I can't understand this questions..and when we checked his writing books, only 2 or 3 sentence could write down on it-every single day!..He said, he can't catch-up what the teacher's writing on board ( he still write  first sentence but they move fast on third). 4 years ago, the same teacher always complain me on how hard to teach him, even she ask aiman to sit in front of her!...( I just keep sigh).

Last year, when parent's day came, I explain everything to the teacher until the teacher got tears on her eyes. may be recall on how she treated my son before..

Now, I teach  my son at home, using work books and system that I bought from relative, myself. Yes he get fast feel boring but we didn't know other way to give education on him. I knew only a school named SmartKids could bear this matter but opportunately we can't afford.

Everyone deserve loved. My son also deserve a love from me even he often stab my feeling as a mother..unbiology mother. Slowly he grew up as a teenager and suddenly I feel so lonley. No more big hugs, no more slept on my arm, no more calling me late night to bring him a bottle of milk...yes, suddenly what our parents felt about us, happened to us nowdays. I hope Allah will give me another child to be pamper by me. If the time could turn 8 years back..I am willing to handle all again, to be a great mother to Muhammad Waziq Aiman..but mom promise to Allah, will always love you, will always forgive you no matter how, because you are my son. May Allah Bless you my son..

HIDUP PENUH RANJAU : Pengenalan

Me, myself, aku...yang sengaja memilih jalan ini, dengan keizinan Allah S.W.T. dan meneruskan kesinambungan hidup yang kuharap sentiasa berasa di jalanNya. Walau sepanjang perjalanan itu nanti akan melukakan aku dan aku terpaksa menangis lagi...

Aku cuma seorang wanita biasa, yang ingin dicintai dan mencintai di sepanjang hidupnya. Dikelilingi oleh kasih sayang dari insan-insan yang bergelar keluarga, dengan sepenuh hati dan seikhlas mungkin. namun dapatkah aku melakukan demikian pula..bukankah setiap yang dihulur semestinya mengharapkan imbal balas? masih adakah insan prihatin yang rela melakukan hal sedemikian rupa tanpa mengharapkan apa-apa? walhal di hatinya penuh dengan rasa cinta, minta disayangi, dikasihi dan dilindungi.

Adakah aku tergolong dalam golongan pertama atau kedua? jawapan bagi persoalan itu bukan aku yang mampu menjawabnya tapi kamu..kamu yang aku rindui sepanjang hari, sepanjang minggu waktu senggangku dan setiap tahun silih berganti, sedangkan kamu telah hilang entah ke mana..hidup lagikah kamu, masih ingatkah kamu kepadaku dan masihkah kamu merinduiku seperti dahulu..dan kenapa jalan pulang kembali ke sini tidak kamu temui, menyebabkan aku bagaikan tersesat dalam duniaku sendiri..Ya Allah...terangilah jalan dalam nuraniku ini agar bisa aku terus menanti di simpang jalan menunggunya kembali..Aminnn.

~bersambung.

PUDDING CUSTARD BY LOLA

I'm glad to share this one with you. I've been taught by Kak Mas at Johor Bahru over 10 years ago and until now, I'm still doing this because my son and my hubby loved to eat it. Very simple recipe and you just follow mine, nothing to worry...

Base ingredients:

2 cups of custard flour
6 cups of water
a pinch of salt


1 tin of condensed creamer
 2 tin of water ( use the empty tin of condensed creamer)
1 cup of sugar ( depend on you)


For dressing:

you can put as many canned fruits as you want or chopped fresh fruits before you eat this pudding . chilled before serve.

Preparations:

1. Stir custard flour, water and pinch of salt until it slowly turn to gold and shinning egg yolk colour. must be patient to stir it. may be for 10 minutes, on a slow stove. When it really cooked, put in the clean plate and make it thin layer or just nice.

2. On slow cooker, bring the condensed creamer, sugar and water, stir until warm. ( don't ever boiled it ).

3. Chilled.

4. Cut the pudding into small cubes. Put together with creamer and all the yummy fruits inside, serve.

My Lovely Pudding Custard

I put some fresh mango on it..yummy.

 

Kongsi Resepi - Pierre Herme’s Chocolate Macarons

Kongsi Resepi - Pierre Herme’s Chocolate Macarons

CHOCOLATE PEANUT BUTTER CHEESECAKE | Recipes | Nigella Lawson: Nigella Lawson's official site for recipes, books and latest news

CHOCOLATE PEANUT BUTTER CHEESECAKE Recipes Nigella Lawson: Nigella Lawson's official site for recipes, books and latest news

CROWN OF LOVE

Sampai sekarang, kalau aku tengok gambar ini, mesti pakat gelak dengan hubby sebab hari tu hari raya, so banyak kedai tak buka lagi. kami sedang meronda mencari kedai dobi di pekan Semenyih, Selangor tapi langsung tak buka. so nak hilangkan kepenatan tu singgahlah di kedai makan baru buka. namanya AL-SHAD. Muslim lah tu sebab ramai yg bertudung dan bersongkok sedang makan. kamipun ambil tempat. kedai baru, pemandangan serba indah dan nampak lazat menu makanan yang dipamerkan. tapi puas aku menacari kelibat si tukang masak ( mata aku ni jahat, suka mengintai siapa yang masak). pekerja2 di situ buat rilek saja, tak adapun menunjukkan ada respon antara ruang depan dan dapur. eh..kat mana pulak diaorang masak?..

lama jugalah menunggu hidangan masak. aku ni jenis 'kurang' sabar. iyelah, org tak ramai tapi servis macam cipan, perut dah lapar ni. sampailah hidangan. aku macam 'sentap' kejap. eh eh bang..macam masakan bangla aje . aku taulah sebab lama bekerja dengan bangla dan pakistan waktu kerja kilang di JB dulu. hubby kata eh..makanlah, tadi kata lapar. aku tenung capati dia, heh..penuh dengan hitam jelaga. dia yg tak tahan dgr aku bising, berhenti makan. iye lah..penuh jelaga...katanya. kami ketawa gelihati, kuah dal penuh dengan lada kering potong campak dan biji sawi. nasi goreng anakku cuma dibubuh kicap dan masih hanyir dengan bau telur yang tak kering digoreng atas nasik..akhirnya, kami cuma minum dan lepas bayar, aku tak toleh dah kedai tu.

motifnya:- tengok kedai dulu sebelum menjamu selera. logo halal pun orang tipu. memanglah bangla dan pakistan tu majoritinya muslim tapi budaya dan citarasanya jauh beza dengan kita...aiihh, kombang tokak den.

Muffin by Lola

Haa...seronok dapat bakar muffin di petang hari. aiman kata sedap, so bolehlah bawa ke pejabat esok. lama tak jumpa Amy-mak cik kecoh kat pejabat. bila dia cuti/kursus, memang terasa sepi pejabat aku tu. Bila dia ada, dgn bos-bos sekali dia kenakan. Bos kami 'TREBAEKKK'. susah nak jumpa bos yang sporting macam En. Eng, En. Nawwar dan En. Kamarulazhar@Azhar.

Lama tak masak nasi di pantry pejabat. Kami cuma bawa gulai secara pot luck. meriah pantry! sekurang2nya dapat jimatkan duit dari belanja di kantin pejabat yang mahalnya macam meniaga dengan DIVA.

Apa2 hal pun, resepinya amat mudah-beli saja sepeket muffin segera di kedai Yummy, Bangi, ada arahan disediakan pada peket tersebut. mudah sungguh dan pasti menjadi..hehehhehehe.